Pastor Husband Daddy: From a Pastor’s Wife

I am sharing words from the heart of a friend today. Please feel free to share with us.

It’s almost midnight and he just left. I should be sleeping, alone, but instead I am here at my computer with my questions. God has heard them before, but I ask again:

Why, God, would you do some miracles for this woman, and then just… not?

Why, God?

I ache for the family suffering out there, where pastor-daddy is. (Care for them, Father.) I ache for the family here, too, where pastor-daddy is not. I was the one who read the bedtime stories, said the prayers, and tucked the covered tightly around the children. They nodded brave faces when I told them that daddy had to go “be with the sad family” yet again. That’s why our plans changed tonight.

Yes, I know he has been gone a lot lately. I miss him, too.

I respect and support this man, and the work God does through him, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t hard.

The children do not understand why dark hospital rooms win out over family nights, but for a pastor, they do, they must. I spare them the details of the sad situation he faces in the hospital.

They say goodnights without complaint, except for one boy. He cries quietly into his pillow. When I lean over to kiss him, he clings tightly to my robe, and I hear his muffled confession, “Mommy, I wish that daddy was something other than a pastor.”

Father, what am I to say to this child?

You have promised to be with us always, even in times of suffering. Help your child, the one who is called to be a pastor to the sad family, because I can see the weariness in his eyes, and I cannot help him. Uphold him, Father.

And help your child’s other children, the little ones who share in the suffering through tiny sacrifices, the little ones who do not understand. Care for them through other hands when daddy is away– through mine, through your Word, through your other children. Care for their little hearts, that they may learn to lean on you in times of trial.

The needs here are more than I can meet, Father.

Care for them, Father

Care for all of us.

Amen.

Comments

  1. Kenda Wathen says

    I was one of those children who often had to allow daddy to go pastor others. He did eventually start making some boundries but some things cannot wait. I know so well that it is hard for a child to miss daddy when he sees his schedule change for someone else.

  2. says

    Please know that He hears the cries of your heart. These are the moments when we simply have to rely on HIM in faith because that is all we have. And when we get up off our knees, dry our eyes and look around–we are stronger because we know that HE is all we need. He knows our every need. And He will provide in His time and His way. There is your peace and comfort. Continue to surrender to Him all your hurts and heartaches.
    “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” 2 Cor. 4:8,9

    My prayer is for your continued faith and strength and for the words to provide comfort and understanding to your little ones.
    In His Love,
    Pam

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