There are several words I could have chosen for my “One Word Resolution” for this year:
But my decision was quick and final. And, honestly, it has nothing to do with January 1. Every day, I desire to be a helpmeet to my husband. Every day, I see areas that I can improve on. After 16 years of relationship (14 married), I know what my husband enjoys and what he detests. I know by the lift of his brow, the release of his breath, the pursing of his lips, the look in his eye, his stature. Sometimes these signs show me a happy husband, a pleased husband. Sometimes they show me a frustrated man. But regardless of his mood, his love for me runs through him like a current. He lives and breathes for his family. He would die for his family. A man that seldom tells me no, who pampers me, and allows me to have my slew of off days. A man who kisses me goodbye every single morning and treats me like a lady, even when I am not acting like one. This is the man that God has molded for me.
And that’s my one word resolution for every day, every year. Helpmeet.
This quote from Secondhand Lions resonates the love my husband has for me:
I’m Hub McCann. I fought in two World Wars and countless smaller ones on three continents. I led thousands of men into battle with everything from horses and swords to artillery and tanks. I’ve seen the headwaters of the Nile, and tribes of natives that no white man had ever seen before. I’ve won and lost a dozen fortunes, killed many men and loved only one woman with a passion a flea like you could never begin to understand. That’s who I am. Now, go home, boy!
My husband is the last of a dying breed. He is a real gentleman who knows how to protect and to provide for his family. Why would I offer him anything except my best when he gives me his best every step of the way?
I’m going to do one of those “write what comes to mind” things with the word “helpmeet”.
And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.—Genesis 2:18
make sure laundry is done and put away, at least his. fresh coffee ready for him in the morning. take care of my appearance. keep the house clean or at least some semblance thereof. keep the foods that he likes to eat on hand, especially his snacky foods. make sure I am able to get the gate for him or that Jace can get the gate for him. put the lid on the toothpaste. don’t bother him about his long work hours. make myself available to help with a willing attitude. do what he asks (he rarely asks for anything so I should be willing to do the few things that he does ask). make sure that we are getting ample “alone” time. be sensitive to the stressful nature of his job. lift him up in prayer. ensure that our children are always giving him the respect that he deserves. look for small things that I can do to please him. keep the inside of the truck clean. make sure that tea is prepared early in the day so it will be cold when he gets home.
So those may or may not seem like a lot to you. Some of them may seem a bit picky or juvenile. But the fact is that I know that these are things that please him. If I know these things, then why wouldn’t I do them? He goes out of his way to take care of me. Full body massage on demand? He’s johnny on the spot. Bring me a cup of coffee, dear? He serves it up, just like a like it. Will you iron this for me? Military pressed. Will you help me move this dresser even though you’re so comfortable on the couch and it’s late? No complaints. Up he gets. Happy to make me happy. I am blessed! And I know I am blessed! And I want him to say the same thing about having me for his wife.
His one word resolution for 2013? Schedule : ) As the only chaplain on an 1,100 man maximum security prison with no clerk to help with the mounds of paperwork that Texas requires, and also as one of the few chaplains who have been asked to be present at the Texas State executions, he is so busy. He genuinely cares for the men on his unit and he needs all of the TLC he can get at home. But if he continues to allow himself to get run down, then he won’t be able to perform at his best level. So we’re going to focus on “schedule” for him. By making sure that I am managing my “helpmeet” status, this will allow him to be more refreshed and ready for work.
If you are interested on reading more about being a (gasp!) submissive wife, read The Joy of Being a Submissive Wife.